Worry Oh Worry! But Why?

The past few weeks have been days & nights of researching, dreaming and worrying.

I thought today would be a good day to address Worry.  Some people worry, some people don’t.  Some worry A LOT and some worry some.

Douglas does not worry.  Rather… Douglas never lets me know he is worrying.  He’s a pretty optimistic guy.  Me, I have a family of worriers.  I’d say I’m a minor worrier. 

My Dad…well… he’s a Major Worrier.  Let me explain.

Since my chat with my dad and his “NO you’re not going to live on a boat because kids need school and parents need to work” comment, I have been very actively ignoring the subject and pretending (when I’m around him) that we are doing no such thing.

Yes, I am fully aware that this is a very childish, immature and impractical approach considering eventually I do intend to take his three grand-kids, pile them into our boat and set off on an adventure of a lifetime. (No. scratch that.  I hope not ‘of a lifetime’ as I dream of doing many more adventures with the family and definitely with Douglas in the many years post the Great Loop).  And yes, I realize he will notice when my personal belongings begin to disappear as I sell off our piles and piles of accumulated stuff, or when my house either has a ‘for sale sign’ and new owners or new occupants who are renting.  And yes, I realize I should just have a rational talk with him.

But here’s the thing.  I don’t want to WORRY HIM.  A year is a long time to worry as it is which is the planned length of the trip.  I assure you, he will worry that whole time.  Every day, Every minute.  He will watch storms like no tomorrow.  He will read about every boat accident, every drowning every everything.  So to add any additional time of worry on top of that feels almost cruel.  Please let me explain a little about my dad.

He’s in his mid 60’s.  He has live in a total of 3 houses his entire life.  He is not good with change.  He loves his Grand Kids (and kids) a LOT.  He is an EXTREME Worrier.  By extreme I mean, CRAZY.  Crazy like he worries if I am having a dinner party with my friends, at my house (which he isn’t invited to) kind of worry.  He’s the “worry” about weather, about accidents, about disease, about us traveling to the store, let alone traveling to another country kind of worrier.

It’s funny because I remember my Gramma had a cartoon cut from a newspaper hanging on a bulletin board in her kitchen which she hand wrote my Grampa’s Name on.  The Cartoon said something like “I’m not worrying” and the picture was of a man standing up, straight as a board on a Hammock.  So I guess Grampa worried too.

Maybe it’s inherited.

I wonder this, as recently I have caught myself in a worry moment.  Mind you, for the most part I’m a “why worry or stress about things you have no control over” or “Don’t loose sleep over your job, you may get hit by a bus tomorrow and it will get figured out” kind of girl.  But a couple of times since we started planning this I have worried about: 1) the cost of the boat and affording to live on it a year, 2) the kids education and what if I’m the worlds worst teacher and break them, 3) my 8 month old puppy and are we making a mistake planning to take her with us.

This was when “Don’t worry be Happy” jumped into my brain.  So instead of sliding down the worry path (i.e acting like my Dad) I compiled my research, my dreams and my common sense.  This is what I came up with.  I am worrying about three things.

1) the Cost of Boat:  one thing Douglas has taught me “Don’t worry about Money – it always has a way of working itself out”.  He’s right.  It does.  I have also learned from observations that I/we do not want to live a life of SAVE SAVE SAVE just to end up a rich and dead!  May as well live the life you want (which you can afford) while you are alive.  I’m confident you don’t get to take your bank account with you when you die, but maybe..just maybe you get to take your memories.  So my goal is to fill my memory bank and fill my families memory bank.

2) the kids education.  Yes, this is the responsible parent thing to worry about.  Right?  One thing I have recently learned is “our public school system may not care about your kid as much as you do”.  Let’s just say kids can and do slip through the cracks which I now realize is how kids can get all the way to high school and be illiterate.  SHAME on OUR SCHOOL BOARDS! But hey – that could be a whole other blog.  So, let’s just say after researching homeschooling and available materials I am CONFIDENT I can’t do that bad and hey – I may even fix a few things in the process.  My one problem with the whole Boat Schooling prospect is currently my girls are in French Immersion.  I am not French and obviously will not be able to teach anything in French, therefore, realistically they will probably be in the English stream upon return.  My Son will only be entering grade 1 when we leave, therefore, sadly will not get to experience french in the immersed way the girls did. Sad?  Yes, but sad enough to give up a Dream…. absolutely NO!

3) my 8 month old puppy Mini-Wheat.  What can I say?  Somehow this little fart has become my 4th baby.  Yes I am fully aware I did not need a new baby as three kids is lots and yes, I realize having an actual new baby would have been much easier, but the kids somehow caught Doug and I both at a weak moment on January 23rd 2012 and we went to pick up this tiny, black bundle.  And I was hooked.   I have researched dogs on boats and if those dogs can do it, my dog can do it!

There you have it.  Nothing to Worry about!

Oh yeah, except telling my dad it’s really happening.

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